Three years for you. And after three years, we had one perfect night together; in that room our hearts and bodies merged in a way that they never had before. Finally, you and I shared what we had always wanted, and it was everything we could have hoped for. We almost forgot that I was leaving the next day, again. I had not seen you for six months before. I have not seen you for four months since. I need you that way again. I need your body bending beneath me. I need to feel your screams, taste your body, breathe your lust, have your love. I will wait for years again, if that is what it takes. But, for fuck’s sake, please don’t let it be.
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I waited.
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I’m a virgin. I’ll admit it. I’m not ashamed of the fact that I am. I’ve told everyone that I don’t want to have sex until I’m married…but that isn’t exactly the truth. Honestly, every moment, all I can think of is being pushed up against the wall in the pouring rain and getting thoroughly ravished. I want to bruising kisses, bites, scratch marks…I want to be tied up and fucked, frantically once, slow and deep the second, with closed eyes and burning skin. I want to feel the connection and love. But I’m ashamed of my body. I feel unattractive, and I’m afraid that whoever I’m with will be turned off because they don’t like what they see. So I pretend I don’t want to have sex until I’m married, when really I’m sexually frustrated as fuck and I really just want to be with someone who loves me.
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You knew I couldn’t do anything with you. Anything at all, ever. I don’t even find you physically attractive anyway, but the fact that you are always going to be my best friend’s first love is what really prevents me from being able to have any kind of relations with you. But you were drunk and you liked my tattoo and you kept touching it. I didn’t care, but then the touches spread to other areas of my body, and I knew I had to stop you. I told you to get off and pushed with all my might, but you’re much bigger than me so I stood no chance. You were a persistent motherfucker. I had no intentions of giving in and I kept fighting you, and then you finally said you would leave me with a kiss on the cheek. So I hesitantly said okay, since you’d kissed my cheek earlier and it was spontaneous and harmless. As your face got near I inched away, but finally I felt your lips on my cheek. That wasn’t a kiss on the cheek. That was a well-executed seduction technique. It was more like you somewhat made out with my cheek, except that sounds gross, and it wasn’t gross at all, strangely enough. For about three seconds, you kissed my cheek in a way I had never experienced or though of before. I actually felt a strong pang of something - desire? - shoot through my whole body and into my groin. I hadn’t felt anything as urgent as that in a long, long time. You probably know I’m sexually frustrated and haven’t gotten any sort of action in months, so that cheek-kiss-bullshit was pretty genius. That was when I wanted to give in, but that was when I also knew more than ever that I had to stop you. I pushed you off, this time with more force, and you kept touching, but this time I liked it. But I was more insistent than ever that you had to go away now. Now that I was tempted, it was even more vital that I didn’t do anything. You said, “You know I’m a fun guy…” and I said I knew, but that this couldn’t be happening for reasons he was well aware of. Plus, the way I know you’re a fun guy is from hearing the sex stories of my friends. That just made me feel weirder when you said that, because apparently you really are one of the funnest guys around in that sense. So that’s tempting as fuck, but the fact that I got that information from my best friends stopped me again. You still tried going in for the real kiss after that but I blocked you with a beer glass. You left soon after, and I don’t really like your appearance or even parts of your personality very much at all, and yet I was thinking about how that cheek-kiss made me feel for two days after that night. Now I can’t feel it quite so vividly, which is probably a good thing, but you had me more sexually frustrated than ever for those two days. I don’t even like you, I don’t even want to do anything with you, but now I need to do something with someone else. It can’t be you and you know why, but thanks for making me sexually frustrated as fuck. As if I wasn’t frustrated enough already. Fuck.
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long distance
it sucks. i hate when i get in that mood and i can’t touch you. and when i see you? i don’t care where we are. i want to push you up against something. i want to kiss you hard. pull your lip into my mouth and bite it. i want to pull up your shirt and suck on your nipples. make you moan. i want to slide my hand into the front of your jeans. feel how wet you are through your underwear. i want to pull those panties down just enough and rub your clit with my fingers. i want to move down a little, coat my fingers before they slide inside you. i want to feel your breath on my face, see your eyes shut tight, hear you moan. i want to feel you squeeze my fingers when you come. and then i want to sprinkle kisses over your face while you catch your breath. later, you can return the favor ;)
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I want us to have the house completely alone. No nosy parents, nobody to bother us. I want you to text me that you’re on the way, and when I open the front door you immediately latch your mouth onto mine and assault my tongue with yours. Your mouth will then trail down to my neck and what little chest is exposed before grabbing my hand and dragging me upstairs. when we get into my bedroom you’ll press me harshly against the wall, kissing furiously while your hands are clasped around my wrists. Then you’ll strip me of my shirt and shorts, and eventually, my underwear and bra. And then you’ll be completely naked too.
And then you’ll throw me roughly onto my bed and climb on top of me, teasing me until I can hardly stand it. Sucking and flicking and pinching and rubbing my nipples until they’re rock hard. Your hands playing with my clit. Your tongue coming down and flicking across it barely. And then you’ll eat me out and I’ll moan so loud and wind my fingers in your blond hair. And right before I’m about to finish you’ll look up at me with a smirk on your face and crash your lips to mine again. And then you’ll begin to thrust into me and I’ll be screaming your name and scraping my nails down your back. And the entire time you’ll be whispering dirty words to me.
And finally when we both finish I’ll scream your name and we’ll both lay on the sheets, sweaty and panting. And then you’ll look over at me with that sexy glint in your eyes and kiss me again.
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You’re my friend, and I love you as a friend, but can we make out again anytime soon? Goddamn…
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You know what I’ll miss the most about you? It wasn’t just that you were my boyfriend, you were the one person I could feed all my passions and fantasies into. I’m going to miss biting your ear or tackling you under your plush white covers in your cold bedroom or you being that one person I could be completely comfortable in ass naked. I love you.
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I want my girlfriend to be with me now. I want to turn her on so much that the bed gets completely wet under her. I want to kiss her madly, to lick her lips, to bite them. I want to lick all the way down to her nipples and suck them hard. I want to lick til my tongue gets on her clit, which I wanna suck, slightly bite and roll around with my tongue. I want to enter her with my fingers, to rub her clit while I’m licking her pussy. I want her to yell my name and to moan in the sexy way she does. Cause that would make me instantly come too
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Being sexually frustrated isn’t fun
You never even think is such a big deal until you’ve had sex… and then going without it… it’s horrible
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I love the moment after fucking when I lay my head on your chest and listen as your heartbeat goes from frantically racing to unbelievably calm. And with our skin pressed together, I feel our sweat cool and bind us together. It’s moments like these that make me want you all over again.
